You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward. Therefore you
have few friends.
GRACES, n. Three beautiful goddesses, Aglaia, Thalia and Euphrosyne,
who attended upon Venus, serving without salary. They were at no
expense for board and clothing, for they ate nothing to speak of and
dressed according to the weather, wearing whatever breeze happened to
be blowing.

[After hitting Jenny's boyfriend]

Forrest Gump: "Sorry I had a fight in the middle of your
Black Panther party"
Oh, look at me! I'm making people happy. I'm the magical man from
Happyland in a gumdrop house on Lollipop Laaane! Oh, by the way, I
was being sarcastic.

-- Homer Simpson
Flaming Moe's
Others claim
Their product good
But ours
Does what
You think it should
Burma-Shave (1960)